song for theme #17B: Gratitude & Forgiveness

“Grateful” by Stephen P. Cook

to be sung to the tune of “My Girl” by Smokey Robinson  and Ronald White / The Temptations

I’ve had trouble, been suffering pain¹

When I’m down like that, dark clouds can dump rain

Tears now all spent

In my head this new mindset

Grateful, feeling so grateful²

Not blaming³ you, I forgive and forget

Not backing resentment, not a good bet

Who’s my sweet pet?

And why is life now no sweat?

Grateful, feeling so grateful

Expecting sunny days, my outlook bright

Running with a kind heart, traveling light⁴

I just won’t let

Dark clouds make me cold and wet

Grateful, feeling so grateful

Less anxiety to get in my way

I’m grateful

With positive thoughts I now play⁵

I’m grateful

Feeling so, feeling so,

Feeling so grateful, yeah grateful

Life is good again and

I’m grateful

SONG—NOTES / COMMENTS     (this song is part of the author’s personal story)

1—This semi-autobiographical song was written during an emotionally challenging period for the author: the late summer of 2013.

      Its inspiration (thank you, Muses!) came while he was running around a track in Socorro, New Mexico and it started to rain.

2—Increasingly, scientific studies link the subjective feelings of gratitude with increased well being: grateful people feeling less

      stress and anxiety, more in control of their lives, greater sense of purpose, more satisfaction with social relationships, greater

      self esteem, less depression, etc.

3—Blame is placed by a displeased angry person on another person, persons, or institution to communicate that they are believed

      to be responsible or at fault for the perceived (real or imagined) offense.  Blame involves making a judgment, serving notice

      that another is being held accountable, and potentially seeking justice.  Depending upon the intensity with which the person

      who has been offended pursues justice, this can lead in many directions: an apology which ends the matter, legal action,

      punishment by law, revenge, punishment by vigilantes, a cycle of violence, etc. 

4—This refers to carrying less emotional baggage. In this regard, compare this worldview theme and song, with the previous

      ones’: the “Bitterness & Vengeance” theme and the “When Justice is Finally Done” song. Simply the feeling conveyed by the

      songs alone presents a big contrast: the “heaviness” of the previous  song with the relative lightness of this theme’s song.  

5—Since the 1952 publication of The Power of Positive Thinking by Norman Vincent Peale part of its basic message has won

      adherents: repeating good thoughts brings good things, while continually dwelling on negative thoughts can bring bad things.

      In short, people create their own reality by their thoughts.

 Comment: this theme can lighten your emotional baggage load by casting off blame (see notes 3 & 4). An infusion of feelings of gratitude, positive thinking (see notes 2 & 5) can emotionally shield you from pain of reliving past trauma. The positive thinking can be part of a general strategy called “meaning-focused coping” in which you use your beliefs and values to instill meaning in a story you’ve constructed (to live in your head) about the good that came out of a stressful, painful event. Example: an economics student who values the “opportunity cost” concept is dumped by his girl friend. His mother comforts him by pointing out “when one door closes, another opens.” Thinking about that, he realizes that as long as he chose to be with the former girl friend he missed out on finding a more awesome girl friend and incurred an opportunity cost.