project WORLDVIEW worldview theme playing card #39 description         copyright 2013               Home  

 heart WV Theme...              #39A / 39B                ...individual<--->individual

  TOUGH LOVE / SCAPEGOATING 

Sometimes kindness does more harm than good.  If I care about another’s development and learning to accept responsibility then I shouldn’t pamper, spoil, mollycoddle, or indulge. Often, helping in a way that does not involve outright giving or meeting all needs is a better approach. Similarly, not explicitly instructing, but rather fostering conditions that allow independent discovery (even if that means learning from mistakes) can provide more meaningful lessons. Rather than accepting excuses or shortcomings, I should confront this person and communicate my expectations as to rectifying behavior. (Note: Another tough way to treat people, characterized more by hate than love, is scapegoating. This involves discriminating against a person by unfairly blaming him or her for some unfortunate situation.)